The reason women don’t play football is because eleven of them would never wear the same outfit in public. – Phyllis Diller
Most children threaten at times to run away from home. This is the only thing that keeps some parents going. – Phyllis Diller
It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge. – Phyllis Diller
We spend the first twelve months of our childrens lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up. – Phyllis Diller