Opera is where a guy gets stabbed in the back, and instead of dying, he sings. – Robert Benchley
A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down. – Robert Benchley
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The naturalistic literature of this country has reached such a state that no family of characters is considered true to life which does not include at least two hypochondriacs, one sadist, and one old man who spills food down the front of his vest. – Robert Benchley
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It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldnt give it up because by that time I was too famous. – Robert Benchley
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