Middle age is when youre sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isnt for you. – Ogden Nash
I have an idea that the phrase “weaker sex” was coined by some woman to disarm some man she was preparing to overwhelm. – Ogden Nash
I hope my tongue in prune juice smothers, If I belittle dogs and mothers. – Ogden Nash
Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other never forgets them. – Ogden Nash
I am firmly of the opinion that women who make a lot of effort to hang onto their looks in middle age (unless they are beauties, entertainers or prostitutes) are rather sad, as one should surely have something more substantial to recommend one by this time, such as kindness or cleverness. – Julie Burchill