Marriage is like a game of chess except the board is flowing water, the pieces are made of smoke and no move you make will have any effect on the outcome. – Jerry Seinfeld
You know youre getting old when you get that one candle on the cake. Its like, See if you can blow this out. – Jerry Seinfeld
Theres very little advice in mens magazines, because men dont think theres a lot they dont know. Women do. Women want to learn. Men think, I know what Im doing, just show me somebody naked. – Jerry Seinfeld
The truth is, I had always wanted to be a comedian, but I really didnt have that kind of personality, and its a terrifying thing to say. – Jerry Seinfeld
In marriage there are no manners to keep up, and beneath the wildest accusations no real criticism. Each is familiar with that ancient child in the other who may erupt again…. We are not ridiculous to ourselves. We are ageless. That is the luxury of the wedding ring. – Enid Bagnold, Autobiography, 1969