You know youre getting old when you get that one candle on the cake. Its like, See if you can blow this out. – Jerry Seinfeld
Men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from women: a little bit of support, and a little bit of freedom. – Jerry Seinfeld
The first real thought that I had of something that I might do was to write for car magazines, because I always had a car thing. – Jerry Seinfeld
A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you dont have a top for it. – Jerry Seinfeld
All I watch is the Food Network. I took a cheesemaking class a few weeks ago, and I told my family and friends to only get me kitchen stuff on my birthday. Im into every kind of cookbook and anything by Anthony Bourdain. Id love to own a restaurant if I could find the right chef. – Jesse McCartney