Quote by David Sedaris
I love things made out of animals. Its just so funny to think of s

I love things made out of animals. Its just so funny to think of someone saying, I need a letter opener. I guess Ill have to kill a deer. – David Sedaris

Other quotes by David Sedaris

Its odd the things that people remember. Parents will arrange a birthday party, certain it will stick in your mind forever. Youll have a nice time, then two years later youll be like, There was a pony there? Really? And a clown with one leg? – David Sedaris

Category:
Birthday
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After a few months in my parents basement, I took an apartment near the state university, where I discovered both crystal methamphetamine and conceptual art. Either one of these things are dangerous, but in combination they have the potential to destroy entire civilizations. – David Sedaris

Category:
Art
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Other Quotes from
funny
category

This is the great thing about Northern Ireland. I walk down the street and people stop me and say things like, I know you. Youre that wee golfer, arent you? I say, Yeah, thats me. They say, Keep it up, wee man. Its very funny and thats why I want to stay here as long as possible. – Rory McIlroy

Category:
funny

I dont deserve this award, but I have arthritis and I dont deserve that either. – Jack Benny

Category:
funny

Im thankful for the three ounce Ziploc bag, so that I have somewhere to put my savings. – Paula Poundstone

Category:
funny

When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. Thats relativity. – Albert Einstein

Category:
funny

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In a country with an overabundance of food, no one should go hungry because of a lack of funds or technical and professional knowledge. We have the food, and we have the networks we now need to support the providers. – Jose Serrano

Category:
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Worry, doubt, fear and despair are the enemies which slowly bring us down to the ground and turn us to dust before we die. – Attributed to Douglas MacArthur

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When I get into bed at night, I hope I dont get into it alone! – Calvin Klein

Category:
alone

Love and friendship exclude each other. – Jean de la Bruyere

Category:
Friendship