Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman wholl give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means youre in the wrong house, thats what it means. – Henny Youngman
When I told my doctor I couldnt afford an operation, he offered to touch-up my X-rays. – Henny Youngman
If you’re going to do something tonight that you’ll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late. – Henny Youngman
Im lucky because I have a job I love. I really miss being away from home, being in my own bed, seeing my animals and siblings, having my moms cookies. I have a couple cats. I got a kitten about a year ago and now Im going on the road so I wont see him for a while. I feel bad. – Michelle Branch