Heckling is an act of cowardice. If you want to speak, get up in front of the microphone and speak, dont sit in the dark hiding. Its easy to hide and shout and waste peoples time. – Billy Connolly
Marriage is a wonderful invention: then again, so is a bicycle repair kit. – Billy Connolly
My definition of an intellectual is someone who can listen to the William Tell Overture without thinking of the Lone Ranger. – Billy Connolly
Once you become successful, people know where you live, the type of house you live in, the kind of car you drive, the clothes you wear, and so it would be patronising to go and talk like a welder. Weldings a mystery to me now. You cant go back, your life changes every day. – Billy Connolly
The very first time I was on a car in Atlanta, I saw the conductor – all conductors are white – ask a Negro woman to get up and take a seat farther back in order to make a place for a white man. I have also seen white men requested to leave the Negro section of the car. – Ray Stannard Baker