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Quote by Demetri Martin
If I have to move up in a building, I choose the elevator over the

If I have to move up in a building, I choose the elevator over the escalator. Because one time I was riding the escalator and I tripped. I fell down the stairs for an hour and a half. – Demetri Martin

Other quotes by Demetri Martin

My favorite fruit is grapes. Because with grapes, you always get another chance. Cause, you know, if you have a crappy apple or a peach, youre stuck with that crappy piece of fruit. But if you have a crappy grape, no problem – just move on to the next. Grapes: The Fruit of Hope. – Demetri Martin

Category:
Hope
Author
Demetri Martin
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Employee of the month is a good example of how somebody can be both a winner and a loser at the same time. – Demetri Martin

Category:
Time
Author
Demetri Martin
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Other Quotes from
Time
category

If you have an important point to make, dont try to be subtle or clever. Use a pile driver. Hit the point once. Then come back and hit it again. Then hit it a third time – a tremendous whack. – Winston Churchill

Category:
Time

Time has a way of demonstrating that the most stubborn are the most intelligent. – Yevgeny Yevtushenko

Category:
Time

Time is that stuff between paydays. – Leo Ochs

Category:
Time

There will come a time when you believe everything is finished. Yet that will be the beginning. – Louis LAmour

Category:
Time

Random Quotes

Every generation laughs at the old fashions, but religiously follows the new. – Henry David Thoreau

Category:
Tradition

The two things I was positive about in life were that I was going to be a teacher at a boarding school or an operative with the CIA posted abroad. I could write a book about all the things I was sure about. – Tucker Carlson

Category:
positive

Science, like art, religion, commerce, warfare, and even sleep, is based on presuppositions. – Gregory Bateson

Category:
Religion

A bit of fragrance always clings to the hand that gives roses. – Chinese Proverb

Category:
Sweetest Day