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Quote by Steven Wright
I have an answering machine in my car. It says, Im home now. But l

I have an answering machine in my car. It says, Im home now. But leave a message and Ill call when Im out. – Steven Wright

Other quotes by Steven Wright

My roommate got a pet elephant. Then it got lost. Its in the apartment somewhere. – Steven Wright

Category:
pet
Author
Steven Wright
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I remember when the candle shop burned down. Everyone stood around singing Happy Birthday. – Steven Wright

Category:
Birthday
Author
Steven Wright
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Other Quotes from
car
category

Buying a car used to be an experience so soul-scorching, so confidence-splattering, so existentially rattling that an entire car company was based on the promise that you wouldnt have to come in contact with it. – Susan Orlean

Category:
car

As I was coming out of the closet, our car was hurtling over an embankment. – Lance Loud

Category:
car

Parking is a nightmare for me… I still have sensors on my car that help me park. – Jordana Brewster

Category:
car

If you are a writer you locate yourself behind a wall of silence and no matter what you are doing, driving a car or walking or doing housework you can still be writing, because you have that space. – Joyce Carol Oates

Category:
car

Random Quotes

Its time for Haitians to have access to health care. Its time to open our borders to the Haitian diaspora, open our markets to the world. Its time to open our country to potential investors. – Michel Martelly

Category:
Health

Dont mistake pleasure for happiness. They are a different breed of dogs. – Josh Billings

Category:
Pleasure

I like to think my dad was easygoing and kind, and I think some of those things have been passed down. I am like him in a sense of being positive and hopeful. He was compassionate, and Ive got a lot of that in me as well. – Joel Osteen

Category:
dad

Honestly, I dont listen to nobody elses music but my own. Its kind of like sports to me. You dont see Kobe Bryant at a LeBron James game – he just works on his own game. And thats what I do. I only listen to me, so I can criticize and analyze and all those things. – Lil Wayne

Category:
Music