Quote by Steven Wright
For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier... I put th

For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier… I put them in the same room and let them fight it out. – Steven Wright

Other quotes by Steven Wright

I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and Im gone. – Steven Wright

Category:
car
Read Quote

I was a peripheral visionary. I could see the future, but only way off to the side. – Steven Wright

Category:
Future
Read Quote
Other Quotes from
Birthday
category

The only thing better than singing is more singing. – Ella Fitzgerald

Category:
Birthday

The reason I met my husband was because I remembered a friends birthday. The moral of the story is: Remember peoples birthdays. – Julianna Margulies

Category:
Birthday

The American flag is an enduring symbol of liberty, democracy, and justice. It is fitting that the House act to protect it as we approach our nations birthday, and as our men and women in uniform rally behind it in Iraqs battlefields. – Joe Barton

Category:
Birthday

Im a summer baby, so I usually have my birthday as a good summer memory. – Sloane Crosley

Category:
Birthday

Random Quotes

Show me a good and gracious loser and Ill show you a failure. – Knute Rockne

Category:
Failure

I watched Italia 90 with my Mum and Dad and my brother, you know, leaping around the house when the penalties were on… It would be great to be part of that, to have that kind of impact. – Steven Gerrard

Category:
dad

I think basically becoming famous has taken the place of going to Heaven in modern society, hasnt it? Thats the place where your dreams will come true. Its an act of faith now they think thats going to sort things out. – Jarvis Cocker

Category:
Dreams

Over the next four years, we will be bold. We will be willing to experiment. We will not fear failure. – Matt Blunt

Category:
Failure