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Quote by Steven Wright
For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier... I put th

For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier… I put them in the same room and let them fight it out. – Steven Wright

Other quotes by Steven Wright

In Vegas, I got into a long argument with the man at the roulette wheel over what I considered to be an odd number. – Steven Wright

Category:
Las Vegas
Author
Steven Wright
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I saw a bank that said 24 Hour Banking, but I dont have that much time. – Steven Wright

Category:
Time
Author
Steven Wright
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I went to the bank and asked to borrow a cup of money. They said, What for? I said, Im going to buy some sugar. – Steven Wright

Category:
Money
Author
Steven Wright
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Other Quotes from
Birthday
category

Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. – Bob Hope

Category:
Birthday

I lost twins at 14 weeks, and I had to have an D and C on my birthday. – Amy Weber

Category:
Birthday

I did a cake for the 60th birthday of Elton John, for Britney Spears 27th birthday and for the Circus album she put out – the cake had circus themes. I prepared a cake for a surprise 82nd birthday event for the architect Frank Gehry the cake was comprised of mini-replicas of his buildings. – Ron Ben-Israel

Category:
Birthday

I grew up doing all that stuff because I was obsessed with the 50s. I had sock hops for birthday parties. So Ive always done The Twist and stuff. It was pretty natural and, with my parents doing it all the time, Id just copy them. Not very pretty. – Brittany Snow

Category:
Birthday

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I think the reaction to a World War II situation would be the same today as it was in 1942. Initially, people would question, but once patriotism got stirred up, the whole thing would gather momentum and wed all pull together. – Parker Stevenson

Category:
Patriotism

Be at the pains of putting down every single item of expenditure whatsoever every day which could possibly be twisted into a professional expense and remember to lump in all the doubtfuls. – Hilaire Belloc

Category:
Shopping

I love the comic opportunities that come up in the context of a father-son relationship. – Harrison Ford

Category:
dad

Every fundamentalist movement Ive studied in Judaism, Christianity and Islam is convinced at some gut, visceral level that secular liberal society wants to wipe out religion. – Karen Armstrong

Category:
Religion