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Quote by Steven Wright
For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier... I put th

For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier… I put them in the same room and let them fight it out. – Steven Wright

Other quotes by Steven Wright
Other Quotes from
Birthday
category

I want a chainsaw very badly, because I think cutting down a tree would be unbelievably satisfying. I have asked for a chainsaw for my birthday, but I think Ill probably be given jewelry instead. – Susan Orlean

Category:
Birthday

Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest. – Larry Lorenzoni

Category:
Birthday

It is ironic that the one thing that all religions recognize as separating us from our creator, our very self-consciousness, is also the one thing that divides us from our fellow creatures. It was a bitter birthday present from evolution. – Annie Dillard

Category:
Birthday

I trained to be a priest – started to. I went to seminary school when I was 11. I wanted to be a priest, but when they told me I could never have sex, not even on my birthday, I changed my mind. – Johnny Vegas

Category:
Birthday

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Half the vices which the world condemns most loudly have seeds of good in them and require moderated use rather than total abstinence. – Samuel Butler

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All history is a record of the power of minorities, and of minorities of one. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

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I will never have a drink and get behind the wheel of a car. Its not illegal to drink and drive, but there becomes a certain point where it does become a crime. – Tracey Gold

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It is better to be defeated on principle than to win on lies. – Arthur Calwell

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