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Quote by Steven Wright
For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier... I put th

For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier… I put them in the same room and let them fight it out. – Steven Wright

Other quotes by Steven Wright

I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldnt park anywhere near the place. – Steven Wright

Category:
work
Author
Steven Wright
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I went to the bank and asked to borrow a cup of money. They said, What for? I said, Im going to buy some sugar. – Steven Wright

Category:
Money
Author
Steven Wright
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I think Gods going to come down and pull civilization over for speeding. – Steven Wright

Category:
God
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Steven Wright
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Other Quotes from
Birthday
category

A gift consists not in what is done or given, but in the intention of the giver or doer. – Lucius Annaeus Seneca

Category:
Birthday

Anybody can have a birthday. It requires nothing. Murderers have birthdays. Its the opposite of anything that I believe in. And I dont like at work where you stop everything to sing Happy Birthday to someone. I feel like thats for children. – Mindy Kaling

Category:
Birthday

I wanted to buy a candle holder, but the store didnt have one. So I got a cake. – Mitch Hedberg

Category:
Birthday

Some people wont go the extra mile, and then on their birthday, when no one makes a fuss, they feel neglected and bitter. – Anne Lamott

Category:
Birthday

Random Quotes

A maker of idols is never an idolater. – Chinese Proverb

Category:
Religion

We have a new generation of very rich people who want to do more with their money than buy a lot of expensive toys. They want to live meaningful lives. – Peter Singer

Category:
Money

I dont think people have been able to deal with the fact that African American filmmakers can make movies about life and relationships. – Tim Robbins

Category:
movies

Walking through puddles is my favorite metaphor for life. – Terri Guillemets, “Evening walk in solitude,” 1989

Category:
Weather