I was going to have cosmetic surgery until I noticed that the doctors office was full of portraits by Picasso. – Rita Rudner
When I eventually met Mr. Right I had no idea that his first name was Always. – Rita Rudner
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I get a lot of return business. I think its all those years I put in traveling around the country people saw me before and had a good time so they want to see me again. – Rita Rudner
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Buying something on sale is a very special feeling. In fact, the less I pay for something, the more it is worth to me. I have a dress that I paid so little for that I am afraid to wear it. I could spill something on it, and then how would I replace it for that amount of money? – Rita Rudner
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