Everything human is pathetic. The secret source of humor itself is not joy but sorrow. There is no humor in heaven. – Mark Twain
If to be interesting is to be uncommonplace, it is becoming a question, with me, if there are any commonplace people. – Mark Twain
Man – a creature made at the end of the weeks work when God was tired. – Mark Twain
I was warned to stop smoking, which I did, for two or three days, but it was too lonesome, and I have resumed — in a modified way — 4 smokes a day instead of 40. This will have a good effect. On the bank balance. – Mark Twain
Im going to do a lot of weird stuff thats not going to be like me prancing around like an insane 12-year-old. I showed everybody that side of me and I think its time to do different stuff, even when it comes down to the type of humor. I want to do some drier, weirder stuff. – Andy Milonakis