England and America should scrap cricket and baseball and come up with a new game that they both can play. Like baseball, for example. – Robert Benchley
There are several ways in which to apportion the family income, all of them unsatisfactory. – Robert Benchley
The naturalistic literature of this country has reached such a state that no family of characters is considered true to life which does not include at least two hypochondriacs, one sadist, and one old man who spills food down the front of his vest. – Robert Benchley
In America there are two classes of travel — first class, and with children. – Robert Benchley