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Quote by Joan Rivers
I dont excercise. If God had wanted me to bend over, he would have

I dont excercise. If God had wanted me to bend over, he would have put diamonds on the floor. – Joan Rivers

Other quotes by Joan Rivers

Don’t cook. Don’t clean. No man will ever make love to a woman because she waxed the linoleum – “My God, the floor’s immaculate. Lie down, you hot bitch.” – Joan Rivers

Category:
Housework
Author
Joan Rivers
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Comediennes are the lucky ones, because if youre funny, you can be 125 years old and they will still accept you. – Joan Rivers

Category:
funny
Author
Joan Rivers
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Other Quotes from
God
category

He was an embittered atheist, the sort of atheist who does not so much disbelieve in God as personally dislike Him. – George Orwell

Category:
God

Not a single time have we gotten a right from Congress or from the President. We get them from God. – Glenn Beck

Category:
God

God gives us our relatives, thank God we can choose our friends. – Ethel Watts Mumford

Category:
God

Marrying for love may be a bit risky, but it is so honest that God cant help but smile on it. – Josh Billings

Category:
God

Random Quotes

War is a profane thing. – Norman Schwarzkopf

Category:
War

Put you energy into music. If it fails you, you can become an accountant or a dentist. And then if you become a dentist or an accountant, its too late to become a musician afterwards. – Peter Tork

Category:
Music

I was influenced by surrealist poetry and painting as were thousands of other people, and it seems to me to have become a part of the way I write, but its not. – Kenneth Koch

Category:
Poetry

Thats why I never became a director. I never had patience with people. – Ray Harryhausen

Category:
Patience