If dogs could talk, it would take a lot of the fun out of owning one. – Andy Rooney
The average bright young man who is drafted hates the whole business because an army always tries to eliminate the individual differences in men. – Andy Rooney
The closing of a door can bring blessed privacy and comfort – the opening, terror. Conversely, the closing of a door can be a sad and final thing – the opening a wonderfully joyous moment. – Andy Rooney
The Super Bowl isnt for kids, I had a great time though and it was worth every nickel of it because by doing this lame piece about the game I can put it on my expense account. – Andy Rooney