My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. My feeling is if they turn out good, then that means I was a good daddy and put a lot of effort into it. If they turn out bad, it means they took after her side of the family. – Jeff Foxworthy

For the first time ever I was taking the family on the road. We stayed with my in-laws, which on lifes list of experiences ranks right below sitting in a tub full of scissors. – Jeff Foxworthy