Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the only time of the month I can be myself. – Roseanne Barr
Experts say you should never hit your children in anger. When is a good time? When youre feeling festive? – Roseanne Barr
Take this marriage thing seriously – it has to last all the way to the divorce. – Roseanne Barr
A guy is a lump like a doughnut. So, first you gotta get rid of all the stuff his mom did to him. And then you gotta get rid of all that macho crap that they pick up from beer commercials. And then theres my personal favorite, the male ego. – Roseanne Barr