When I die, Im leaving my body to science fiction. – Steven Wright
I have an answering machine in my car. It says, Im home now. But leave a message and Ill call when Im out. – Steven Wright

When I die, Im leaving my body to science fiction. – Steven Wright
I have an answering machine in my car. It says, Im home now. But leave a message and Ill call when Im out. – Steven Wright
Last year I went fishing with Salvador Dali. He was using a dotted line. He caught every other fish. – Steven Wright