Quote by Jack Handey
What is it about a beautiful sunny afternoon, with the birds singi

What is it about a beautiful sunny afternoon, with the birds singing and the wind rustling through the leaves, that makes you want to get drunk? – Jack Handey

Other quotes by Jack Handey

Somebody told me it was frightening how much topsoil we are losing each year, but I told that story around the campfire and nobody got scared. – Jack Handey

Category:
Camping
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As the evening sky faded from a salmon color to a sort of flint gray, I thought back to the salmon I caught that morning, and how gray he was, and how I named him Flint. – Jack Handey

Category:
Fishing
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Somebody told me it was frightening how much topsoil we are losing each year, but when I told that story around the campfire, nobody got scared. – Jack Handey

Category:
Environment
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Other Quotes from
Alcohol
category

Alcohol is a misunderstood vitamin. – P.G. Wodehouse

Category:
Alcohol

Where ever I go, there I am. Drunk. – Rita E. Torres

Category:
Alcohol

Whoever takes just plain ginger ale soon gets drowned out of the conversation. – Kin Hubbard

Category:
Alcohol

The worst thing about some men is that when they are not drunk they are sober. – William Butler Yeats

Category:
Alcohol

Random Quotes

Spread joy. Chase your wildest dreams. – Patch Adams

Category:
Yearbooks

I see happiness as a by-product. I dont think you can pursue happiness. I think that phrase is one of the very few mistakes the Founding Fathers made. – James Hillman

Category:
Happiness

I mean, sports are big, big, big business. – Phil Lesh

Category:
Sports

When the courts decide that murderers, rapists, and others who maliciously break our social contract deserve health care that most working Americans cant afford, they are condemning good people to death. – Tammy Bruce

Category:
Death