Memory impairment: the free prize at the bottom of every vodka bottle. – Big Bang Theory, “The Agreement Dissection” (season 4, episode 21, original aird

I prefer to think that God is not dead, just drunk. – John Marcellus Huston

There are two reasons for drinking: one is, when you are thirsty, to cure it; the other, when you are not thirsty, to prevent it…. Prevention is better than cure. – Thomas Love Peacock, Melincourt, 1817

If food hath slain its thousands, then drink has slain its tens of thousands. – William Kitchiner, Directions for Invigorating and Prolonging Life, 1831