I told my mother-in-law that my house was her house, and she said, “Get the hell off my property.” – Joan Rivers
Dont tell your kids you had an easy birth or they wont respect you. For years I used to wake up my daughter and say, Melissa you ripped me to shreds. Now go back to sleep.. – Joan Rivers
Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is Gods gift, thats why we call it the present. – Joan Rivers
Comediennes are the lucky ones, because if youre funny, you can be 125 years old and they will still accept you. – Joan Rivers
There are good people and bad people in all organizations fundamentally however, when you look at the basis of the Tea Party it has nothing to do with race. It has to do with an economic recovery. It has to do with limiting the role of our government in our lives. It has to do with free markets. – Tim Scott