Im often dating people, but I dont say it because you sort of know it wont last long. – Graham Norton
Straight men just cant imagine the bliss of being in a relationship with someone who finds farting as funny as they do. – Graham Norton
Because society places a value on masculinity, gay men aspire to it. If you go to a gay club and the doorman says, You do realise this is a gay club, dont you lads? you get all excited because you think, Wow, he thought I was straight! – Graham Norton
My ambition was to stop waiting tables. That was how I measured success: finally, I was able to stop waiting tables, and I was able to pay the rent, and that was by being a stand-up comic. Not a very good stand-up comic, but good enough to make a living. – Graham Norton