Most people want to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch. – Robert Orben
I remember when humor was gentle pokes. I used to call it arm around the shoulder humor. Now they go for the jugular and they take no prisoners. Its mean, mean stuff. – Robert Orben
Never raise your hand to your children – it leaves your midsection unprotected. – Robert Orben
A vacation is having nothing to do and all day to do it in. – Robert Orben
And so, Reader, (for it is time to have done with guessing) would I bid you conquer in your warfare against your four great enemies, the world, the devil, the flesh, and above all, that obstinate and perverse self-will, unaided by which the other three would be comparatively powerless. – Augustus William Hare and Julius Charles Hare, Guesses at Truth, by Two Brothers