I love being married. Its so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life. – Rita Rudner
Buying something on sale is a very special feeling. In fact, the less I pay for something, the more it is worth to me. I have a dress that I paid so little for that I am afraid to wear it. I could spill something on it, and then how would I replace it for that amount of money? – Rita Rudner
Some women hold up dresses that are so ugly and they always say the same thing: This looks much better on. On what? On fire? – Rita Rudner
I want to have children, but my friends scare me. One of my friends told me she was in labor for 36 hours. I dont even want to do anything that feels good for 36 hours. – Rita Rudner
Greatness lies, not in being strong, but in the right using of strength and strength is not used rightly when it serves only to carry a man above his fellows for his own solitary glory. He is the greatest whose strength carries up the most hearts by the attraction of his own. – Henry Ward Beecher