The Internet is just a world passing around notes in a classroom. – Jon Stewart
Our culture is just a series of checks and balances. The whole idea that were in a battle between tyranny and freedom – its a series of pendulum swings. – Jon Stewart
McVeighs lawyer got him the death penalty, which, quite frankly, I could have done. – Jon Stewart
The seven marvels that best represent mans achievements over the last 2,000 years will be determined by Internet vote… so look for Howard Sterns Private Parts to come in No. 1. – Jon Stewart
I always want to say to people who want to be rich and famous: try being rich first. See if that doesnt cover most of it. Theres not much downside to being rich, other than paying taxes and having your relatives ask you for money. But when you become famous, you end up with a 24-hour job. – Bill Murray