I havent trusted polls since I read that 62% of women had affairs during their lunch hour. Ive never met a woman in my life who would give up lunch for sex. – Erma Bombeck
Thanksgiving dinners take eighteen hours to prepare. They are consumed in twelve minutes. Half-times take twelve minutes. This is not coincidence. – Erma Bombeck
Dreams have only one owner at a time. Thats why dreamers are lonely. – Erma Bombeck
The Rose Bowl is the only bowl I’ve ever seen that I didn’t have to clean. – Erma Bombeck
I think I had kind of an advantage. When I was growing up, my dad had just got out of jail and he had a great record collection. He had – it was all – these were the songs. So I heard a lot of these songs, like, my whole life, so for me it was easy. I already knew what I was going to sing. – Chris Isaak