Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will eat for a lifetime. Teach a man to create an artificial shortage of fish and he will eat steak. – Jay Leno
Today, one year after their divorce, Pamela and Tommy Lee announced theyre getting back together. You know what that means? Theres still hope for Ike and Tina Turner. – Jay Leno
Bush reiterated his stand to conservatives opposing his decision on stem cell research. He said today he believes life begins at conception and ends at execution. – Jay Leno
Major league baseball has asked its players to stop tossing baseballs into the stands during games, because they say fans fight over them and they get hurt. In fact, the Florida Marlins said thats why they never hit any home runs. Its a safety issue. – Jay Leno