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Quote by Mitch Hedberg
My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them. - Mit

My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them. – Mitch Hedberg

Other quotes by Mitch Hedberg

Every time I go and shave, I assume theres someone else on the planet shaving. So I say, Im gonna go shave, too. – Mitch Hedberg

Category:
Time
Author
Mitch Hedberg
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I dont have a girlfriend. But I do know a woman whod be mad at me for saying that. – Mitch Hedberg

Category:
dating
Author
Mitch Hedberg
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Other Quotes from
funny
category

Sometimes in the most tragic situation, something just profoundly funny happens. – David Hyde Pierce

Category:
funny

I was born in very sorry circumstances. Both of my parents were very sorry. – Norman Wisdom

Category:
funny

All right everyone, line up alphabetically according to your height. – Casey Stengel

Category:
funny

I didnt plan to be the rude middle-class comedian. You write a certain type of joke that you find funny, and mine happen to be often rude. Yes, its juvenile, but thats me. – Jimmy Carr

Category:
funny

Random Quotes

If someone decides to be a musician now, it means because there is no hope of money at the end of it, it means they really want to be a musician. And if someone is writing now, there is no hope for money at the end of it. – Doug Coupland

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Courage enlarges, cowardice diminishes resources. In desperate straits the fears of the timid aggravate the dangers that imperil the brave. – Christian Nestell Bovee

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Kinkades paintings are worthless schmaltz, and the lamestream media that love him are wrong. However, Id love to see a museum mount a small show of Kinkades work. I would like the art world and the wider world to argue about him in public, out in the open. – Jerry Saltz

Category:
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I cant wait for my little sisters to start dating, because it will really be fun to pick on their boyfriends. – David Gallagher

Category:
dating