You dont appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life. – Emo Philips
When I wake up in the morning, I just cant get started until Ive had that first, piping hot pot of coffee. Oh, Ive tried other enemas. – Emo Philips
Women: You cant live with them, and you cant get them to dress up in a skimpy little Nazi costume and beat you with a warm squash or something. – Emo Philips
My computer beat me at checkers, but I sure beat it at kickboxing. – Emo Philips
I can sometimes sit for two hours in a room with almost no thought. Just complete stillness. Sometimes when I go for walks, theres also complete stillness; theres no mental labeling of sense perceptions. Theres simply a sense of awe or wonder or openness, and thats beautiful. – Eckhart Tolle