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Of the demonstrably wise there are but two: those who commit suici

Of the demonstrably wise there are but two: those who commit suicide, and those who keep their reasoning faculties atrophied by drink. – Mark Twain, Note-Book, 1935

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A woman drove me to drink and I never even had the courtesy to thank her. – W.C. Fields

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We borrowed golf from Scotland as we borrowed whiskey. Not because it is Scottish, but because it is good. – Horace Hutchinson

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