A cynic is a blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, and not as they ought to be. – Ambrose Bierce
Painting, n.: The art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather, and exposing them to the critic. – Ambrose Bierce
Learning, n. The kind of ignorance distinguishing the studious. – Ambrose Bierce
Marriage, n: The state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two. – Ambrose Bierce
Whenever somebody says they need an angle for their story I always fear that theyve got an idea and they want me to fit into it or they want me to come up with an idea myself or Im supposed to be more revealing than Ive been, and to me it just sounds like something I dont want to do. – David Duchovny