Mad, adj.: Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence. – Ambrose Bierce
Logic, n. The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding. – Ambrose Bierce
Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion. – Ambrose Bierce
Ocean: A body of water occupying two-thirds of a world made for man — who has no gills. – Ambrose Bierce
Someday well learn the whole story of why George W. Bush brushed off that intelligence briefing of Aug. 6, 2001, Bin Laden Determined to Strike in U.S. But surely a big distraction was the major speech he was readying for delivery on Aug. 9, his first prime-time address to the nation. – Frank Rich