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Actually I never did stand up. Im not that funny. - Maynard James

Actually I never did stand up. Im not that funny. – Maynard James Keenan

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Other Quotes from
funny
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I feel sorry for people who dont drink. When they wake up in the morning, thats as good as theyre going to feel all day. – Frank Sinatra

Category:
funny

As a five-year-old in Berlin in 1965, I didnt know that funny women existed. It wasnt until I got back to England that I realised women could be funny. – Jenny Eclair

Category:
funny

You find out in life that people really like you funny. So what do you give em? Humor. And then if you show them the other side, they dont like you as much. I find, too, that I can hide behind the idiots mask being funny, and you never see the sorrow or the pain. – Terry Bradshaw

Category:
funny

Sometimes I think what I write is funny in its quiet way. – Doris Lessing

Category:
funny

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HELP = H(umor), E-go, edging God out, L-istening, P-urpose – Ken Blanchard

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If you do everything you should do, and do not do anything you should not do, you will, according to the best available statistics, live exactly eighteen hours longer than you would otherwise. – Logan Clendening

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The world is seldom what it seems to man, who dimly sees, realities appear as dreams, and dreams realities. – Samuel Johnson

Category:
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Love your country. Your country is the land where your parents sleep, where is spoken that language in which the chosen of your heart, blushing, whispered the first word of love; it is the home that God has given you that by striving to perfect yourselves therein you may prepare to ascend to him. – Giuseppe Mazzini

Category:
USA Patriotic