If your opponent is playing several shots in vain attempts to extricate himself from a bunker, do not stand near him and audibly count his strokes. It would be justifiable homicide if he wound up his pitiable exhibition by applying his niblick to your head. – Harry Vardon
A new father quickly learns that his child invariably comes to the bathroom at precisely the times when hes in there, as if he needed company. The only way for this father to be certain of bathroom privacy is to shave at the gas station. – Bill Cosby
