My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. My feeling is if they turn out good, then that means I was a good daddy and put a lot of effort into it. If they turn out bad, it means they took after her side of the family. – Jeff Foxworthy
My grandmas the most careful, safe driver in the world. You put her in a rental car, and shes doing doughnuts in the K-Mart parking lot! – Jeff Foxworthy
Its a weird sensation to be mad and learning at the same time. – Jeff Foxworthy
If your neighbors think youre a detective because a cop always brings you home, you might be a redneck. – Jeff Foxworthy
The United States established itself as a trustworthy new nation in its first two decades after the Revolutionary War by paying its debts, even when many in the country believed it had no obligation to do so. Alexander Hamilton, the founder of this newspaper, insisted on it. – John Podhoretz