Very few people possess true artistic ability. It is therefore both unseemly and unproductive to irritate the situation by making an effort. If you have a burning, restless urge to write or paint, simply eat something sweet and the feeling will pass. – Fran Lebowitz
If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater… suggest that he wear a tail. – Fran Lebowitz
Being a woman is of special interest only to aspiring male transsexuals. To actual women, it is simply a good excuse not to play football. – Fran Lebowitz
Vegetables are interesting but lack a sense of purpose when unaccompanied by a good cut of meat. – Fran Lebowitz
Today, Passover is used as an opportunity to reflect on the things that plague our world, to seek justice for the still-oppressed and even to bring together multi-faiths family and friends under the common banner of universal freedom. – “Passover 2011: The Unleavened Basics,” Huffington Post