For three days after death, hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off. – Johnny Carson
If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam. – Johnny Carson

For three days after death, hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off. – Johnny Carson
If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam. – Johnny Carson
I was so naive as a kid I used to sneak behind the barn and do nothing. – Johnny Carson
Happiness is your dentist telling you it won’t hurt and then having him catch his hand in the drill. – Johnny Carson