That son of a bitch was able to hole a putt over 60 feet of peanut

That son of a bitch was able to hole a putt over 60 feet of peanut brittle. – Lloyd Mangrum, about Bobby Locke

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Who watches golf on TV? Who calls eight friends over and gets a keg of beer? Landscapers, I guess. They sit around the TV, yelling, “Will you look at that golf path?Pure pea gravel.” – Jeff Cesario

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My body is here, but my mind has already teed off. – Author Unknown

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Actually, the only time I ever took out a one-iron was to kill a tarantula. And it took a seven to do that. – Jim Murray

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If you wish to hide your character, do not play golf. – Percey Boomer

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