Everyone knows that debugging is twice as hard as writing a program in the first place. So if you are as clever as you can be when you write it, how will you ever debug it? – Brian Kernighan
Acquire the habit of speaking to God as if you were alone with Him, familiarly and with confidence and love, as to the dearest and most loving of friends. – Alphonsus Liguori
Louie brought his new girlfriend over, and the nicest thing I can say about her is all her tattoos are spelled correctly. – Robert Harling, Steel Magnolias