Day, n. A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent. – Ambrose Bierce
Happiness: an agreeable sensation arising from contemplating the misery of another. – Ambrose Bierce

Day, n. A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent. – Ambrose Bierce
Happiness: an agreeable sensation arising from contemplating the misery of another. – Ambrose Bierce
Ocean: A body of water occupying two-thirds of a world made for man — who has no gills. – Ambrose Bierce
Sweater, n.: garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly. – Ambrose Bierce