Quote by Ellen DeGeneres
People always ask me, Were you funny as a child? Well, no, I was a

People always ask me, Were you funny as a child? Well, no, I was an accountant. – Ellen DeGeneres

Other quotes by Ellen DeGeneres

I was doing stand-up at a restaurant and there was a chalkboard on the street out front. It said, Soup of the Day: Cream of Asparagus. Ellen DeGeneres. – Ellen DeGeneres

Category:
Comedy
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My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She’s ninety-seven now, and we don’t know where the hell she is. – Ellen DeGeneres

Category:
Grandparents
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Ive been trying to find women writers for my staff for a while now and I have three women on my staff and three guys so its pretty equal. I dont know why that is. Its been the same thing for a while. Its hard for female comedians to stand out. Thats weird. Thats a shame. – Ellen DeGeneres

Category:
Women
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Other Quotes from
funny
category

As I get older, all sorts of things become less funny. Once one has children, any cruelty involving children becomes far less amusing than when one was at the mercy of ones friends and relatives children. – P. J. ORourke

Category:
funny

The funny thing is that Im the girl who no one sees at the beach. Ask anyone whos traveled with me. Normally, Im in so many layers, I look like Lawrence of Arabia! – Vera Wang

Category:
funny

I think its always funny when somebody thinks youre going to do something super sexy and then you dont. – Olivia Munn

Category:
funny

The first time I sang in the church choir two hundred people changed their religion. – Fred Allen

Category:
funny

Random Quotes

My mom and father are extremely proud. They love it when I dont die. Ive done so many movies where Ive died that their first question when I book a job is, So, are you going to die in this? – Michael Ealy

Category:
mom

The ordinary man is an anarchist. He wants to do as he likes. He may want his neighbor to be governed, but he himself doesnt want to be governed. He is mortally afraid of government officials and policemen. – George Bernard Shaw

Category:
Anarchy

I am just learning to notice the different colors of the stars, and already begin to have a new enjoyment. – Maria Mitchell

Category:
Learning

A business like an automobile, has to be driven, in order to get results. – B. C. Forbes

Category:
Business