Most of us end up with no more than five or six people who remember us. Teachers have thousands of people who remember them for the rest of their lives. – Andy Rooney
If dogs could talk, it would take a lot of the fun out of owning one. – Andy Rooney
The federal government has sponsored research that has produced a tomato that is perfect in every respect, except that you cant eat it. We should make every effort to make sure this disease, often referred to as progress, doesnt spread. – Andy Rooney
When those waiters ask me if I want some fresh ground pepper, I ask if they have any aged pepper. – Andy Rooney