Marriage, n: The state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two. – Ambrose Bierce
Zeal, n. A certain nervous disorder afflicting the young and inexperienced. – Ambrose Bierce
To be positive: to be mistaken at the top of ones voice. – Ambrose Bierce
Anoint, v.: To grease a king or other great functionary already sufficiently slippery. – Ambrose Bierce
You will reciprocally promise love, loyalty and matrimonial honesty. We only want for you this day that these words constitute the principle of your entire life and that with the help of divine grace you will observe these solemn vows that today, before God, you formulate. – Pope John Paul II