There are two things in life that a sage must preserve at every sacrifice, the coats of his stomach and the enamel of his teeth. Some evils admit of consolations, but there are no comforters for dyspepsia and the toothache. – Henry Lytton Bulwer
Men often think submission indicates weakness, that letting someone else take charge betrays a character deficit. But we all submit to strangers who drill into our teeth as long as we can see the parchment on their wall which reads “Dentist.” – Edmond Manning, King Perry
I sort of try to write everything for me. Im a huge sports fan but have no interest in minutiae. I dont remember who won Super Bowls five years ago or listen to sports talk radio. Im trying to make sure the jokes are self-contained so theyre accessible to everyone. – Norm MacDonald
