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Golf is the cruelest game, because eventually it will drag you out

Golf is the cruelest game, because eventually it will drag you out in front of the whole school, take your lunch money and slap you around. – Rick Reilly, “Master Strokes,” Sports Illustrated

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If your opponent is playing several shots in vain attempts to extricate himself from a bunker, do not stand near him and audibly count his strokes. It would be justifiable homicide if he wound up his pitiable exhibition by applying his niblick to your head. – Harry Vardon

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I guess there is nothing that will get your mind off everything like golf. I have never been depressed enough to take up the game, but they say you get so sore at yourself you forget to hate your enemies. – Will Rogers

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Real golfers, no matter what the provocation, never strike a caddie with the driver. The sand wedge is far more effective. – Huxtable Pippey

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One of the most fascinating things about golf is how it reflects the cycle of life. No matter what you shoot — the next day you have to go back to the first tee and begin all over again and make yourself into something. – Peter Jacobsen

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