A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold. – Ogden Nash
Here is a pen and here is a pencil, heres a typewriter, heres a stencil, heres a list of todays appointments, and all the flies in all the ointments, the daily woes that a man endures — take them, George, theyre yours! – Ogden Nash
Middle age is when youre sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isnt for you. – Ogden Nash
There is a homely directness about these rustic apothegms which makes them far more palatable than the strained and sophisticated epigrams of the characters of Oscar Wilde’s plays, who are ever striving strenuously to dazzle us with verbal pyrotechnics. – Brander Matthews, “American Aphorisms,” Harper’s Magazine, November 1915,