I dont think the government is out to get me or help someone else get me but it wouldnt surprise me if they were out to sell me something or help someone else sell me something. I mean, why else would the Census Bureau want to know my telephone number? – Andy Rooney
If you smile when no one else is around, you really mean it. – Andy Rooney
The average bright young man who is drafted hates the whole business because an army always tries to eliminate the individual differences in men. – Andy Rooney
I dont like food thats too carefully arranged it makes me think that the chef is spending too much time arranging and not enough time cooking. If I wanted a picture Id buy a painting. – Andy Rooney
The reason why Im here today is to explain why I am running and what I will do if you give me the honor and the privilege of representing you in the United States Senate. Now Im running for the United State Senate for a simple reason, and that is…I want to win a Nobel Peace prize. – Marco Rubio