Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a function. – Garrison Keillor
They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad that Im going to miss mine by just a few days. – Garrison Keillor
Welcome to Lake Wobegon, where all the women are strong, all the men are good-looking, and all the children are above average. – Garrison Keillor
The highlight of my childhood was making my brother laugh so hard that food came out his nose. – Garrison Keillor
And so, Reader, (for it is time to have done with guessing) would I bid you conquer in your warfare against your four great enemies, the world, the devil, the flesh, and above all, that obstinate and perverse self-will, unaided by which the other three would be comparatively powerless. – Augustus William Hare and Julius Charles Hare, Guesses at Truth, by Two Brothers