You always hear people saying, I hope Im not turning into my dad, but Id be honoured if I became half as decent a bloke as he is. – Johnny Vegas
It is easy for me to love myself, but for ladies to do it is another question altogether. – Johnny Vegas
I think if youre at the point where youre popular enough to sell your wedding photos to OK! Magazine then you dont need the money. – Johnny Vegas
Sometimes, comics will make the observation that its not jokes that are funny, its characters that are funny. And isnt that true! Thats why I always kill jokes. Im terrible at them, because I get the joke right, but I cant get the character right, and it just goes down like a lead balloon. – David Mitchell